There’s really no right way to overcoming sexual burnout knowing that, every couple is different with strength and stressors peculiar to them.
Here are some ways to combat the hurdles of burnout in other to foster a healthy sexual intimacy:
Communicate your expectations openly- Sexual burnout is often as a result of mismatched energy expectations; when a spouse is not having his/her needs met.
Share your desires, needs, and feelings, be honest about what you want and what’s not working.
- Rekindle emotional connection by scheduling regular date nights or activities that you both enjoy.
Practise active listening and empathy, show appreciation and gratitude for one another. - Schedule intimacy- When you stop having fun with your spouse and it starts to feel like work. To overcome this feeling, couples will have to prioritise stress-free quality time with each other, by dedicating time for sexual and intimacy connection over other tasks.
Create a relaxing and comfortable atmosphere for activities you used to enjoy doing together. Planning this may feel awkward at first but honouring your time together will make it feel more natural.
Explore new ways of intimacy- Try new sexual positions or techniques and explore sensual massage, erotic touch, or role-playing and even nonsexual touching like hugs and caresses. Encourage physical intimacy since reduced physical intimacy is a common sign of burnout. Evaluate your current tendencies with touching, so if you find yourself sitting far apart when watching a movie; consider cuddling or holding hands; and if you find yourself avoiding sex, have a conversation with your spouse and look for ways to work towards physical and mental wellness like couple’s therapy or a romantic weekend getaway. Feel free to add some fun to your intimacy with sex games for couples.
Address relationship issues- Identify and work through conflicts and resentments. Practise forgiveness and understanding and seek couples’ therapy if need be.
Respect alone time- Take breaks and practise self-care while prioritising individual well-being and stress management. Engage in hobbies, and practise self-compassion. Be sure to encourage your lover to do the same.
Seek professional help- Couples experiencing relationship burnout often benefit from speaking to a certified integrative sex therapist To identify underlying issues and develop strategies:
- Reignite passion and excitement- Get new experiences like a new hobby or adventure. Surprise each other with small gestures or gifts.
Create a “spark list” of things that ignite passion and excitement. - Focus on foreplay and intimacy- Make building sexual connection and arousal before sex a priority.
Explore different types of touch and intimacy; so take your time and enjoy the process.
- Show affection and appreciation- Get to regularly show gratitude and affection for your lovebird by showing physical affection like hugs, kisses and cuddles.
Work as a team, be each other’s cheerleader: celebrate milestones and special occasions.
Overcoming sexual burnout takes time, effort, and communication from both of you.
Be patient, supportive, and open to re-igniting the spark in your relationship.
Sexual burnout doesn’t have to be the end of the marriage as it can be a chance for it to get stronger.
Let today be the day you take your first step to feeling better.